Eve Online Will Not Beat Me: Action; Reaction; Farmhole

Hello space traveller,

I have been doing an awful lot recently. The world seems to have gone a little bit mad, so there has been ample time to play some space games and ample need to escape into experiences that make us feel good!

Eve has been doing that for me in spades and has taught me an awful lot about how the game needs to be played. One of my corpmates, Lane Davaham, said something to me that really stuck in my mind about playing Eve: “This game requires patience” – and that is so true. Eve is a game where you can spend a few days fighting fleet after fleet and feeling totally drained with all the content, but also a game where you need to spend weeks just letting the game tick away, training skills or waiting for a plan to come to fruition.

This lesson has been a really hard to take onboard, especially when I don’t have that much time to invest into the game. I resolved myself to stay casual since I’ve returned, but it’s difficult not to feel left out when your corp goes on weekend-long ops that you can’t take part in, but that’s the way it goes. I just have to be happy with being involved with the things I can take part in, and set up my Eve experience so I can get the most out of the time I am able to invest.

To that end, our little side-project is progressing decently; it’s a farmhole – which, in true Eve fashion, has been hit with problem after problem.

We asked around and ended up being able to form an agreement with the owner of an Astra in a wormhole that met our specifications, so we could stay there until we were up and running. The moment we moved in however, another corp, set up a Raitaru and have been reffing our structure ever since. They don’t seem to be very committed to the endeavour though, as we’ve beaten them back multiple times and they aren’t running a full-time eviction operation.

So for the time being, we’re looking for another farmhole while we wait to see if the situation changes in the meantime.

I am planning on starting a little podcast/stream when we do get the farmhole up and running, because I’m really curious to see if people want to listen to a bored Englishman/Frenchman/Serbian shit-talk for hours while Krabbing.

Stay tuned, there’s loads going on!

Boboko Busanagi – BNYSE

The Ups And Downs Of A Creative Life

Hello dear reader,

it has been a week of strange motivations. I took a few days off work to recharge and spend some amazing time with my lady Emma, I spent that time playing games and doing absolutely nothing productive at all, even though, in the back of my mind I intended to and secretly wish I had.

I go through long periods of wanting to be better and I tell myself that I got to work, that I need time to myself, that I love playing games; repeating all those things that you tell yourself when you’re putting things off, without even intending to or understanding the reasons why you’re putting them off in the first place.

Deep down I think I know and the feeling scares me a little bit. Deep down there is a little creeping fear that everything I’m doing and all the time I’m spending will never come to anything, that all the effort will be wasted, nobody will ever get to see my writings or the products of my work.

I hate that feeling, so I think I distract myself by making the conscious decision to not try, or to make excuses why I couldn’t try in that moment, then I feel the existential guilt that only a creative can feel when another day has ticked by without actually having made any strides towards the endeavours that make you love being creative in the first place.

How do I navigate around this strange catch-22 that I have pretty much always found myself in? Do I just let the feeling take me and do whatever the hell I want, even if it will take ten years to finish a project? Or do I push myself to finish something and then try my best to get it out there?

The trouble is I don’t know…and I feel like I don’t have the time, knowledge or motivation to get involved in a creative community that might allow me to get my work out there.

How do you know where to best put your time to get your work done, get it out into the world and to keep yourself sane?

I think I’ll be asking that question forever, but maybe one day I’ll find an answer. The important point is that I’m not going to stop. I can’t stop, and if you’re ever tempted to stop, know that in all your unsure and nervous attitude about whether your work is worthy, well it always will be, we need new ideas; all of them.

Keep going, and I will too.

Topic Tuesday: Failure and Mistakes

Failure, mistakes, trial and error. All ways of expressing the same thing, opportunities to learn, but heard to understand them as such in the moment.
I’m a planner, I love to plan, to come up with game plans and schedules. But rarely, RARELY, do we implement them for very long. There’s pleasure and accomplishment in the making of lists, in figuring out a good looking schedule but following comes with little of the same rewards. Once one thing slips, the whole plan feels useless.
We came up with the plan for getting content on to the site, for getting me to learn and to climb out of a lull but as I tried to research I realised that it wasn’t going to work. My brain just doesn’t take in information, reading and comprehension are just beyond me at this point. I wanted to prepare myself for writing, I wanted to have a good foundation but right now I just need to write, I need to get stories out of me and to get the words down. A good editor can help me with the things I don’t understand. So Topic Tuesdays are going to be a little different and more relaxed than I envisioned, but hopefully more fun to both write and read.
I focus on the thing that I’m not doing right now, example, I’m writing this and thinking about cross stitch. Another, last night I was desperate to design more cross stitch but all I could think about was my fantasy world. Another, I wanted to do exercise this morning so I focused on thinking about climbing a mountain, while John looked it up and I sat on the couch not doing anything. Urg!
Each cycle that I go through, each time I fail, I’m learning, and that’s what I’m choosing to focus on. Each time I get a little closer to who I want to be.
I have the time. Many people would kill for the time and the space that I have and I’m pissing it away worrying and stopping myself, but no more! (Well probably still some bumps in the road but I’m gonna try!!)
If you’ve failed, try again, change what doesn’t work and keep trying. Failure isn’t the end, it isn’t, it’s just the beginning!

Photo Friday – Motivation

We’ve been stalled for a couple of weeks now, it’s rather frustrating. So we are renewing our dedication and fighting the urges that have resulted in our plateau. This is our fridge and our words of encouragement .

I wish you strength in all your endeavours.

Photo Friday: The First!

Our collection of love themed plushies

John and I don’t care for Valentine’s Day, we prefer to have a good relationship all year round. However, in recent years, we have taken to collecting cute teddies, but this year we haven’t managed to find one that is to our liking. But maybe throughout the year we will find a new member!

Have a great Friday, whatever you’re getting up to!

Thoughtful Thursday: Schedule and the Future

Changes are afoot!

For a little while we’ve been struggling with this site and the content going up has been sporadic. But no more! We’ve worked together and come up with ideas and a plan to share our lives and passions in a better way!

Our schedule:

Modelling Monday – On Monday’s John will post a picture about a Warhammer 40k model (or group) and tell you a little about it. Perhaps in the future I, too, will share some of my Skaven troops.

Topic Tuesday – I’m tired of only having a passing knowledge of my interests. In order to combat this I’m going to be picking a topic and attempting to learn all I can about the things I love, then I’ll report back on the next Tuesday! We can take a learning trip together. Things to expect: history of cross stitch, components of writing (tenses, sentence structure, words, etc.) and interesting facts.

Wildlife Wednesday – This will most often just be a picture from one of our nature walks, but occasionally we’ll post something about the photo.

Thoughtful Thursday – A day for updates, random thoughts, stories, anything we fancy!

Photo Friday – A photo from our week that we want to share.

Sneak Peek Saturday – A sneaky look at something upcoming, whether it’s a photo or a few words.

Sleepy Sunday – A day off (in spirit, John still has to work his day job).

So that’s what we’ve come up with and what we’ll be trying for the foreseeable future. It’ll be a more interesting array of content. In the background I’m going to be working on my fantasy world and my fantasy detective series and John will be working on the games he is developing. If you want more cross stitch content I suggest following my smidgemakes Instagram/Twitter where I’ll be posting pictures and updates of progress.
For a little life update, while we’re here, things are going well! I’ve pulled back on my artist pursuits in order to focus on writing and cross stitch. I’m more than ready to give my passions the time they need. We are still getting healthy, and going on more walks and I’m having little dance parties to get more movement in!

That’s it for the first Thoughtful Thursday. Have a wonderful day!

Cross Stitch Corner: Experiments

At the start of this year I made it a goal of mine to make my own cross stitch patterns. I thought that it would be many months before I gained the knowledge, experience and whatnot to be able to do such a thing. But cross stitch is a wonderful thing and it’s so easy to create things. Using an app on my iPad called StitchSketch I can turn my drawings into cross stitch!

the corner of a screen shot of a cross stitch chart
A sliver of my design.

Eventually I want to sell the digital charts, if people are interested, but first I have to figure out how to make a pdf look nice and all that pavlova.
In order to test the app and to make sure that I was doing things right I used a simple pattern and the colours I had on hand. When I use this chart (are they patterns or charts? I get so confused since I’ve done many crafts) again I’ll use a lighter blue for the sky and a white for the cloud.

Progress
Finished!
Felt to cover the back

I had a lot of fun with this one, even stitching that felt on the back was interesting. I need more practise at finishing and I would stitch up the aida a different way next time but for my first original project it’s pretty great!

I’m pleased to say that the app worked and my cross stitch came out better than I imagined. The app is a little tough to use (I’m used to the ease of Procreate) but I’m sure I’ll get to grips with it. I can only use it for short periods as it only has a “dark mode” and the white writing on a black background gives me headaches and makes my eyes all funny! But I will be creating many more charts and projects.

So that’s my practise and I’m excited for many more to come! Have a wonderful day.

Building My DeathWatch Army.

Hello!

January has ended and the next one has begun, did you know we’re into a leap year? Crazy.

I’ve been plodding along with my projects, well some of them. I got the chance to order some warhammer in the middle of January and spent a few frantic days assembling them for the gaming club that I run on a Tuesday.

Last time as I mentioned, for my second army after Orks, I decided that I wanted to collect DeathWatch because they are basically the exact opposite of Orks: low model count, lots of strategic options, decent survivability on the models. I’m really enjoying how the army plays, it’s a nice change.

So I decided to order the Start Collecting box in addition to the codex.

The best thing about the start collecting box for DeathWatch is the upgrade sprue you get, it includes ten DeathWatch shoulder-pads, which are really what I needed to upgrade my existing marines and make them look the part. You also get an absolute ton of bits to upgrade your amrines, which kind of caused me an existential crisis like I’ve never experienced with warhammer before.

Normally, when you build a unit, you have a few choices, but it doesn’t take much time to decide how you want to build them; maybe your heavy weapon squads require a little more thought, but you usually have the decision down after not too much thought. DeathWatch veterans however have so many options and such interesting ways to play that I genuinely had no idea how to build them, so I had to turn to the things I did know: I built my smash captain and my venerable dreadnought.

I converted the Captain Artemis model in the start collecting box with a few bits to give him a jetpack, storm shield and thunderhammer – classic SmashCaptain fare. I’ll upload a picture of him later once I’m finished painting because I’m actually really happy with how it turned out.

After they were finished I literally stared at my phone and the codex trying to figure out what I was going to do. Eventually I went with a half-meta half-fun build. One unit of veterans with Storm Bolters and Storm Shields, one unit of heavy weapons; infernus heavy bolters and normal heavy bolters and a full unit of melee veterans with a range of weapons and some frag cannons thrown in.

I think the army I’ve built is going to perform pretty averagely on the battlefield based on who I’m facing, but it’s going to do what I wanted with this army…basically allow me to play games without bringing 100+ models to the table.

Tune in next time when I take you through my painting results!

January Update

The sun has set on January (at least where I am) and I’m checking in with myself and you.
I’m very grateful that this year I’ve taken up bullet journaling, it makes looking back and keeping things in perspective really easy. I’ve managed to accomplish quite a bit, and much more than I thought from the top of my head.
For ten minutes or so each day I’ve been doing full body stretching and I’ve found that my back is much less painful, I recommend it!
Though the month has been overall good, there are things that I definitely need to work on in the coming months. Getting up early, getting out of the flat and more reading are the biggest things.
Posting more regularly is something I want as well, the problem with that is I’ve been working on world building, which I can’t really show, and my other projects are taking quite a while. I will have some cross stitch content coming up in the next few days but after that I’m not sure.
I’m in the midst of soul searching, trying to figure out what I like, what I want and how I want to present myself. For so long I’ve been a shallow person, somewhat of a shadow person and I’m ready to be a full, solid, colourful person. So for a little bit I may be a bit short of content, but I’m never too far away!
That’s it for my little end of the month update, in short, all is well and I’ve had a good start to the year. I hope that it is the same for you. Good luck for February.

Warhammer 40K And The Joy Of Making

Hello dear reader!

I have been busy over the last few weeks. In my previous post, I made various statements about what me and Emma wish to do this year. All of this has been pulled into sharp focus over the last week or so as I have been battling a furious illness, but I’m now on the mend!

What I’m here to talk about is my love of Warhammer, specifically 40K, which has somewhat taken over my life of late. There is a gaming cafe quite close to me that opened midway through last year and for the longest time I have wanted a place to go to play my games, specifically Warhammer. I noticed that while they had a limited stock they didn’t really have a time or place for people to play the game.

So, I approached them at the end of last year to basically volunteer to start a “learn to play Warhammer” session on tuesday evenings and it’s going amazingly well! Every time I arrive with my models, there are more people wanting to learn and to get their models onto the table; to me, it just shows that if you just give people the opportunity, they will show up and participate.

This has led to me investing a bit more time and money into my armies. I collect Orks and for the longest time, this was the only army I did collect, but in the interest of having two armies, one for me to play and one to loan out, I have started a Deathwatch army.

deathwatch army painted undercoated
First pass on undercoating, almost ready to purge the Xenos.

I’ve never collected an Imperium army before and I wanted one that would cater to my needs: low model count(because Orks), high special abilities and lots of customisation options. I also had ten random terminators hanging around so something that would allow me to utilise them would be handy.

I must say, I think Deathwatch are one of the most fun armies I have ever had the pleasure of modeling and playing. Because the lore of the army means that they are special forces with a predilection towards fighting aliens (and equipping stolen alien technology, it gave me loads of scope for kitbashing and making MY DUDES; so I have been having a great time snipping, gluing and tweaking to get them just as I want them. They are so fun to play on the battlefield too.

bitz box crafting custom open toolbox
My box of tricks!

Next, I need to convert one of my terminators into a chaplain, I think I’m going to try and record the process and put it on our youtube channel, follow the link below and subscribe to check that out when I upload it in a day or two!

terminator model conversion project
His devotion will be tested once I snip him into shape!

Until next time, have fun and be happy.